Body Hair: Back, Sack and Crack

My genes predispose me to body hair. Ask any Greek… I am sure that those of you who have been on holiday in the Mediterranean have been astounded by those Greek [and Italian] men who are outrageously hairsute. I’m not quite as bad as this guy…

but I would win most “guess who’s the hairyist man on the beach” competitions…

It was George Michael who was famously asked if there was anything he would like to change about himself. Without hesitation he replied “body hair”.

George Michael

 I’m sure that as he languishes in prison he dreams of the day when he can book his next back, sack and crack.

My cousins have the same problem as me and to be honest, it’s tough on the girls. One cousin admitted to having undergone ten-years of laser hair removal to zap all of her legs hair and now her 15-year-old daughter is undergoing regular waxing before it gets too late…

Do you remember the movie 40 Year Old Virgin with Steve Carell? The chest waxing scene?

I saw that movie soon after a friend had given me my first treatment. I was going on holiday to Cyprus and wanted that smooth look. I got it but God, was it painful!

The problem is, it’s not just hair front and back, it’s everywhere. My partner sometimes calls me her hobbit not because I am particularly short but I would have little tufts of wirey hair sticking out of my ears if it was not trimmed on a regular basis…

No, that’s not me. It’s my brother [only joking John].

Then there is the nose hair. I’ve got one of the horrible little machines that grinds away nose hair…

but it irritates my nose and makes me sneeze every time I use it, so out with the sharp scissors again.

Eyebrows as well..

I have no desire to look like the UK politician Dennis Healy but if I didn’t trim them i would be going that way.

The silly thing of course is that body hair is not only natural but it helps to keep you warm in winter, if you have enough of it.  I like everybody else these days seem to have a prejudice against hair, unless it is on my head. I suppose it is because we are bombarded with images of hairless people, so it has become the aesthetic norm. I suppose it is something to do with the fetish we have towards youth. Young people tend to have little body hair, so to appear young, it has to go…

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About stevehollier

Steve Hollier is the editor of AZ Magazine, an English language lifestyle magazine based in Baku, Azerbaijan. He began his career working for a firm of stockbrokers in the City of London then went on to attend the University of Essex where he was awarded an MA in Sociology in 1984. After a career in arts and cultural development work, he became a freelance arts consultant, writer and photographer.
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2 Responses to Body Hair: Back, Sack and Crack

  1. Hugh Paxton says:

    Annabel says “That’s gross!”

    I think she was referring specifically to George Michael.

    Please shave befoe you visit!

  2. Edwin says:

    Well thank God that now a days there are hair removal options through advancement in medicine so you can permanently get rid of the hairsuit!

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